I noticed my vocabulary here is being restricted to non-offensive language. May i ask why?

I noticed that yesterday when I tried to say sh*t!
I don't swear that much, but when I do I enjoy it. I'm going to miss it!

Not a problem for goody two shoes me.

Because I want to help Boot set a better standard for you cretins. Also, so that our forum isn't blocked for people who are accessing it from work. A lot of companies have software to block out web pages with naughty words.

It's also better to present a wholesome image to the center of America, Corn Town visitors.

POAC's raising your game, Jack. I know it's painful, but there are non-profane synonyms for most of the words you like to use.

[Mr. Mackey:] There are times when you get suckered in
By drugs and alchohol and sex with women-mmkay
But its when you do these things too much
That you've become an addict and must get back in touch
You can do it Its all up to you-mmmmmkay
With a little plan you can change your life tooo-day
You dont have to spend your life addicted to smack
Homeless on the streets giving handjobs for crack
Follow my plan and very soon you will see-eeyy, its easy mmkay

Step 1: Instead of arse say buns, like "kiss my buns" or "you're a buns hole"

Step 2: Instead of sh*t say poo, as in "bull poo", "poo head" and this "poo is cold"

Step 3: With bitch drop the t because bich is latin for generosity

Step 4: Dont say f*ck any more because f*ck is the worst word that you can say

So just use the word mmmkay!

[Children:] We can do it its all up to us-mmmkay (mmmkay)
With a little plan we can change our lives tooo-day
Mr, Mackey: you can change it today
Everyone: We don't have to spend our lives shootin up in the trash
Homeless on the streets giving handjobs for cash
Follow this plan and very soon you will see-eey
Its easy mmkay!

[Mr. Mackey:] Step 1 Children: Instead of arse say buns,
like kiss my buns or you're a buns hole

[Mr. Mackey:] Step 2 Children: Instead of sh*t say poo,
as in bull poo, poo head and this poo is cold

[Mr. Mackey:] Step 3 Children: With bitch drop the t
because bich is latin for generosity

[Mr. Mackey:] Step 4 Children: Dont say f*ck any more

[Everyone:] Cuz f*ck is the worst word that you can say
[Children:] f*ck is the worst word that you can say
We shouldn't say f*ck, no we shouldn't say f*ck, f*ck nooooo!!!
[Mr. Mackey:] Your cured, you can go!
[Everyone:] We don't have to spend our lives shootin up in the trash
homeless on the streets giving handjobs for cash
Follow this plan and very soon you will saaay
Its easy mmmkay!
[Children:] It's easy mmmkay!
[Mr. Mackey:] It's easy mmmkay!
[Children:] It's easy mmmkay!
[Mr. Mackey:] It's easy mmmkaaaaaaaayy
[Children:] It's easy mmm
It's easy mmm
It's easy mmm
It's easy mmmkaaaay
[both finish at same time]
[laughing]
[Mr. Mackey:] Mmmkay
Mmmkay
Mmmkay

but I LIKE to swear, mmmkay?

Jack, there are lots of ways of offending people without using profanity. Get creative.

Creativity is not my thing.

Lets just see which words are bleeped and which aren't

f*ck
sh*t
arse
bitch
dick

Um....ah! I'm bored with this. I'm going to get sh*t faced.

He seems to have a pretty good handle on most of them. Hopefully, with age, his sublety and sarcasm will improve.

Lets hope, you old f*ck.

Darn, still don't have the hang of it.

Takes YEARS of practice young buck.

YEARS!

Well any perceived deficits i may have in the maturity of my sense of humor is more than made up for in my health, appearance, and opportunities.

Here, let me try.

One substitution that has limited use is phallus for dick, now combined in the derogatory sense [as in phallushead] it may be even more insulting, however it could be seen as pompous or the user perceived as having a swelled head[so to speak]. Richard Cranium is also acceptable in some circles.

Not nearly enough photo's at that link!

I could ask my 13-year-old for all the possible variations. He knows them all, and finds them infinitely amusing.

I prefer the non-obscene approach to insult and injury. Sort of a meat and potatoes variety, of the sort Jonathan Swift illustrated with linguistic dexterity.

I always thought this was a quite interesting and very noticable fact about Christianity